Monday, June 17, 2013

Kara Marie

It's called "Busy Mom" around here, that's why I haven't been very faithful at emailing and keeping you updated.  So this might be short and to the point but that seems to be all I have time for these days.  (I know, go ahead and laugh, you that have more than one kiddo in the house)  We are having lots of fun though with our sweet little Kara.  Her smiles are so precious these days.  Rare, yes.
I'll just give a run down of our trip to NYC a week and a half ago.  We left around 7:30 Wednesday morning and arrived in the Bronx right around 1:00.  We parked up the street from Xavier and Angela's house to meet with the case workers (discussed some things) and then walked to the house.
We had a very open time of discussing our lives, their lives, Kara's progress, our/their level of openness in the adoption.  
We also shared some gifts with them (not even coming close to the value of the "gift" they gave us).  A P.Graham Dunn plaque with the verse from Jeremiah 29:11, a basket with some goodies: 2 kinds of cheeses, grape jelly, asparagus, choc/toffee pretzels, potted plant, lollipops. Chocolate chip cream cheese bars, a stuffed puppy for Nevaeh (Kara's sister), (Kara has a matching puppy)  After we left, the case worker told us that they were all over the goodies; and what warmed my heart is Muenster cheese is Angela's favorite! I think it was a little God-thing :)
You might be wondering why in the world I would give asparagus as a gift- well, it was suggested to us that since they are intrigued with our community and they haven't ever bought something from a farmer's market let alone had a garden, that something grown here and that's in season (which isn't much right now) would be a nice gift for them.  Hence the asparagus.  It sounded fun to them.
At one point while we were there, Xavier asked Marvin to step into another room with him.  He wanted Marvin to know that -Marvin is the dad and that he is ok with it.  Our faith encouraged him and possibly reconsidering church/getting back to God.
Marvin thanked him for choosing life, etc.  And tried to validate him.  Kara was not a mistake.
At one point Angela shared with the case worker and me that she scheduled or planned to abort Kara 10 times but never felt right about it.  PRAISE GOD!!!!!!!!
After about an hour the grandmother thought it was time to pack up and let us head home.
We tucked little Kara in her car seat.  Took some pictures with the parents.  And then came the good-byes.
It felt almost like I was ripping a piece out of their lives.  We hugged, we cried, thank you's were said (thank you seemed like such a pitiful word, but what else was there to say?)  Neither of our lives will ever be the same; we are rejoicing; they will be mourning.  It's so bittersweet.  
What a feeling on the way home - going from just the 2 of us to now having a baby!  And she's staying!  I'm not just babysitting, she's ours.
We arrived home around 8:30 to a lovely decorated house.  Some friends popped in while we were gone and put up streamers, balloons, and fun baby things.  It was so special to know that they thought of us in that way.
Mom & Dad B. stopped by to see their new little granddaughter soon after we got home.
Our first couple of days/nights were interesting - trying to get to know each other and get in a routine.  Kara has adjusted very well.  (I think we have too :)
The doctor in NYC had said Kara will need surgery to place a shunt within a couple of weeks because of Hydrocephalus.  We decided we want to transfer her to a doctor closer to us.  So we have been in contact with a Neuro doctor from Rochester.  An appointment was scheduled for last Wednesday.  Kara's head circumference is outside of the normal growth curve but at this point it is still following the curve (not shooting straight up - if that would happen, something would have to be done soon).  A CT scan was done at the hospital the same day.  Her ventricles are enlarged but the doctor is not so concerned that something should be done immediately.  He said placing a shunt is a life long commitment.  Also, she still had soft spots on her head; no hardness or extreme pressure where there shouldn't be.  She eats VERY well (as in about every 2-3 hours), does not cry excessively, sleeps well (waking only about once a night for feeding).  So there's really no concerning symptoms other than larger head size/ventricles.
The doctor would like to see her on June 21 to check head circumference/to see if there's been notable change.  So at this point there is no surgery scheduled!  And we would be very happy if there never is!
Thank you again for your many prayers for our little family.